This issue the, STD: Save That Dollar section looks at music and books – movies were scheduled, but we all had hot dates and face time killed the movie reviews! We French kissed mad German girls while listening to all the promo CDs that publicity practitioners try to buy our time with. Dizzee Rascal got homie to sixth base (we asked, but sixth base involves take-out and Kofi Annan, gross!). We had a cool looking book that we all read in the Format washroom for a couple weeks, it was cool – one dude spent 45 minutes in the can with it! No sticky pages! A+ reviews, now!

The White Stripes
Icky Thump

It’s really easy to talk about Jack White and Meg White’s creepy, pseudo-sexual, quasi-sibling dynamic until blue in the face, but that is old and, let’s face it, with a rack like Meg White has, Alabama mating morals are in! Icky Thump is not as impressive as Meg White’s autonomy anatomy, but worth a try.

– Olajuwon Verson

Justice
†

Once, I dated this attractive hairstylist with pale skin, red lips, tattoos and dirty vocabulary. She was great in bed, in fact, her sex should be used as a negotiation tool for peace in Iraq – her sex feels like Justice’s † album. Sure, there are lots of guest appearances and the productions can be confusing, but the hard kicks and deep, deep bass lines provide endless hours of NSA audio for any Craigslist.org encounter!

– Drexler Armello

Chromeo
Fancy Footwork

On October 5, 1970, members of the Front de liberation du Quebec, FLQ to English speaking people, kidnapped James Richard Cross, a British Trade Commissioner. The FLQ held Cross for ransom, demanding $500,000 in gold, the release of 23 political prisoners and unlimited poutine. Sike on the poutine! Chromeo are two dudes from Montreal that enjoy cheesy pop music with a `80s aesthetic. Chromeo kidnaps ears and holds sweaty, happy, screaming girls’ hearts for ransom.

– Kemp Illups

You Say Party! We Say Die!
Lose All Time

The problem with Vancouver is non-stop rain. Mix rain with excessive hills (thanks, God?!) and a junkie problem (bring back litter!), and Vancouver is the armpit of Canada. Lose All Time is an armpit of an album, too, with its gutter-witticisms in its song titles, like “Downtown Mayors Goodnight, Alley Kids Rule!” – hold the Skytrain! YSP! WSD!’s Lose All Time is the armpit of a beautiful, slim woman with no history of VD.

– Augmon Ardaway

R. Kelly
Double Up

In high school, R. Kelly was probably a funny looking dude – over bite? But now, R. Kelly can look anyone in the chops and say he did it his way. A quasi-pervert and permanently 13-years-old, sure, but, on Double Up, R. Kelly taps into the spirit of sexy, deep and powerful R&B pop anthems that make all the girlies say: yAo, POP dAt, POP dAt pOoOsYz. wHamP, WhAmP!

– Parish Bryant

Shop Boyz
Rockstar Mentality

When the San Antonio Spurs won the 2007 NBA Finals, their center, Francisco Elson, kept shouting “Party like a rock star” while Tony Parker fumbled with his MVP trophy and Eva Longoria (the most popular Spur, ever) stole the cameraman’s attention, I thought, why is this asshole screaming “Party like a rock star,” because the Spurs are the most boring basketball team on Earth.

– Bird O’Neal

Dizzee Rascal
Math + English

The most annoying part of every raprave DJ’s mix in spring `07 was “Pussyole.” Actually, NIYI’s “808 Klap” is pretty fucking annoying, too. Actually all these douche bags from the UK that rap are pretty fucking annoying. Fuck this shit. Boycott! Wait a minute! Skinny girls with fat asses love this music and gyrate, juke and twerk to this music as if blow was free and it was raining American Apparel models. I love Dizzee Rascal.

– Starks Ebber

Steve Grody
Graffiti L.A. Street Styles and Art

The third book in a loose series published by Abrams, Graffiti L.A. Street Styles and Art, by Steve Grody, is an illustrious, analytical look at graffiti in Los Angeles. Readers accustomed to the aesthetic focus of previous HNA releases, Graffiti World, and Graffiti Women, by Nicholas Ganz, will not find the same style of arrangement in Graffiti L.A. . Although the book is full of master piecework by Los Angeles veterans, the images in Graffiti L.A. illustrate the concepts Steve Grody introduces, rather than simply display the work of a variety of artists. Grody, with the aid of writers quotes, explores the initial influences of graffiti in L.A., the writers unique technique and aesthetic, the social elements, and the ethical issues, in Los Angeles and surrounding areas.

– Shane Ward