50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

Formatmag.com Presents 50 Signs That You’re Obsessed with Sneakers:

1. When you realized Formatmag.com dropped their annual sneaker issue in September, you put on your best kicks before reading it.
2. Vacations are just a chance to visit different cities’ shoe stores.
3. You have developed a style of walking that neither creases the toe nor flexes the body of the shoe.
4. You know who Tinker Hatfield is.
5. You’ve lined up (or camped out) for shoes.
6. You vividly remember each and every shoe regret (a pair you didn’t cop when you had the chance).
7. You keep the box of every pair you buy – as well as the crinkled tissue-paper wadding inside the shoes.
8. You love Air Force 1’s and Dunks.
9. You hate how played Air Force 1’s and Dunks have become.

10. You’re into kicks that aren’t Nikes (and you must be a lonely dude in the game).

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

11. You’re mad when they never release the colorway you want.
12. You then create the colorway in Photoshop and post it on NT.
13. You have a Jumpman tattoo.
14. You wish you had a Jumpman tattoo.
15. You have the And 1 man tattoo (oops, that just means you’re in the NBA – or really, really wish you were).
16. You’ve got a pair of kicks you ain’t see nobody rock, not online or eBay or the streets.
17. You dislike a particular basketball player based solely on his shoes.
18. Based solely on design, you cop the signature shoes of a player you dislike immensely (VC, anyone?).
19. You’ve driven over 200 miles to cop a pair, and you don’t even own a car.

20. You remember your first sneaker as fondly as your first girlfriend (maybe moreso).

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

21. On more than one occasion, you’ve had people (girlfriends, family, friends) cop a pair on release-date because you were otherwise entangled (like working at your job).
22. You must lace up your kicks yourself, even if they come pre-laced.
23. Your shoes must be included in any picture you’re in
24. You chat with the peeps on NT more than your girlfriend.
25. Your 9-to-5 at your 9-to-5 is eBay.
26. You make Top Sneakers of the Year lists (like this one).
27. You know the two non-Jordans Mike wore in the NBA (Air Ships & Air Flight Ones).
28. Moms bought you skips growing up, and years later, you’re getting your revenge.
29. You know who Bruce Kilgore is.

30. You buy doubles.

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

31. You can’t afford to, but you buy doubles anyway
32. You saw Space Jam in the theatre (word to Bill Murray rocking J2s pre-retro, as well as Terminators in a Gatorade commercial, also pre-retro).
33. You hate when Nike puts out cheap versions of nice joints (Zoom Kobes vs. Zoom Legends, Hurache 2K5s vs. Total Package, More Uptempo vs. Much Uptempo, etc.).
34. You have over 20 pairs of the same model in different colorways.
35. You buy clothes based on how they coordinate with your kicks.
36. You keep saying “this is the last pair…” knowing full-well it ain’t.
37. You not only clean your sneakers regularly, you also have a tool kit (toothbrush, suede brush, sole brush, shoe-cleaner, etc.).
38. There are kicks you haven’t wore in years – because you just can’t find them amongst all the shoe boxes.
39. You know what kicks you’d like to be buried in.

40. You buy more than doubles.

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

41. You buy kicks that aren’t your size – and not necessarily to resell.
42. You buy your girlfriend nice kicks in a lame attempt to get her into the game (which doesn’t often work).
43. You call it “the game.”
44. You hate when Nike (or whoever) puts out a re-issue of a sneaker that you own the original of.
45. You’ve signed an online petition to bring a particular model back into production.
46. You know that Mike Bibby wore Foamposite Ones in the NCAA ’97 championship game, and Khalid El-Amin wore Flightposite Ones in the NCAA ’00 championship game.
47. You’ve asked someone on the street “where’d you get those?”
48. Someone on the street has asked you “where’d you get those?”
49. You actually believe wearing _________s make you a better basketball player (hey, 90% of the game is mental – but not the sneaker game; 90% of that is dollars)

50. Your calendar is marked with release dates, not holidays.

51. You have sneakers on your wallpaper (if you don’t, find them here).

50 Signs You’re Obsessed With Sneakers

Rick Kang

Latest posts by Rick Kang (see all)

23 comments

  1. This is sooo true, especially the cleaning toolkit one. I clean my kicks religiously. Gotta stay lookin’ fresh.

    Here’s another one: You know you’re obsessed with sneakers when you’re a law student that rock kicks even when dressed up in a suit, until you ABSOLUTELY have to put on dress shoes.

  2. mj actually wore three pairs of non-jordans the other were penny 2’s after the xi’s he was wearing in the playoffs were banned becuase they didnt coordinate with the uniform.

  3. there should probably be something like…
    “you get mad when you see people wearing fakes sneakers”

    or

    “you laugh inside yourself when u see some one wearing fake kicks”

  4. yoo…
    ii cought myself readiin tha liist nd noding my head thru tha whole thiing!!!
    my brother was readiing iit w.me nd jus kept sayiin…”damn…thts sadd!!…(but true…)”

  5. Hey there should be something like: you spend lots of your time surfing the internet for a nice pair you´re after(Happens a lot!!!)…
    You read articles like this one you guys put up & you laugh cause you know its so true… Ah its funny!!!…

  6. “You buy your girlfriend nice kicks in a lame attempt to get her into the game (which doesn’t often work).”

    tried it, and yeah it doesnt work, lol.

  7. dave "Viper" G says:

    Great Piece!

    I really like how you used “words” to get “inside” the mind of a sneakerpimp…

    I feel obligated, however, to mention Etonics (the “forgotten” sneakers) and how they’ve never gotten enough credit in sneaker history. They were way ahead of their time technology-wise, used forward-thinking materials and unveiled a slew of brilliant designs that appealed to both 1. Math nerds and 2. Rockers/Metalheads.

  8. And we would be remiss if we also didn’t celebrate the fact that Dominique “the Human Highlight Film” Wilkins once had a signature line of Brooks, which I believe a certain “Viper” also once owned.

    If Dominique had won that infamous Dunk contest between him and Mike in ’88, who knows? Maybe they’d be constantly reissuing ’88 Brooks “Dominiques” instead of Jordan IIIs….

    Or maybe not.

  9. I knew I was addicted to sneakers when I found myself renting a 12 x 12 storage room (climate controlled, of course) to store my neverending accumulation of sneakers in. I had to create a legend to show where each pair is located. Floor to ceiling being about full in that one, I’m as I type, contemplating a second 12 x 12. Sick? U b the judge.

  10. u forgot to put…

    U KNOW U A SNEAKER HEAD, WHEN WHEN U CARRY A SHANK WHENEVER, CAMPIN’ OUT IN FRONT OF A SNEAKER STORE…

  11. U ALSO, FORGOT…

    U KNOW U A SNEAKER HEAD… WHEN U MEAN MUG, DUDES WHEN THEY, LOOKN AT UR FRESH N FLY KICKS…

  12. oh my geez !! more than half of this list is true for me…i love my sneakers more than my brother ! (lol)

  13. Yo they should also mention thy you know when your obssesed when you use bleach on the white parts of your nikes. And tht you clean the bottoms of your kicks even tho PLO don’t see em haha like 95percent of this shit is true lmao

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